I knew I had to make you mine. My story is very similar, 28 years after we finished she has contacted me. Why was she keeping contact with me? A lot of it. Long Distance Break-Up – Should I Go to See My Ex? She is the only one who really knows why she’s doing what she does. A few weeks ago, I saw my ex boyfriend from 30 years ago in a casino (of all places). I broke with my ex girl 6 years ago, i did never say to her that i miss her, or love her, when i talk to her i allways show her that she mean no thing for me, and tell her bad words, and give her cold feeling, but truthly i do love her from the deep of heart i wish if i can see her look at her eyes kiss her hug her but i can not, so i think he stil remember you and think about you he is human being like you and he got the same feeling but you did hurt him that way his acting this way . In hindsight perhaps she was giving me one last chance to stop her engagement? I never stopped thinking about him, and always, always regreted not going through with the pregnancy. I contacted her to tell her I was getting married hoping she would tell me "No" maybe I thought she missed me. Please help. Should I tell him to stop contacting me? I started talking with an ex-boyfriend about 2 months ago and I'm also married. I just want a better closure because he deserves it and it would also help me as well. W hen I was 19, I had my first girlfriend. But unless you've committed some of the typical post-breakup mistakes, getting back with an ex is not dependent on you—but rather on your ex and the months and years of time. If on the other hand, you want her back, then I suggest you stop this “why is she doing this to me? Do I leave it along and send an email say every few months seeing how things are going, or do I try to connect with him on a friendly level and see we can become friends via email only? The fact of matter is, you may still miss your ex years after your breakup, and that's OK. !” victim mentality and get down to working on a plan/strategy to get her back while she’s still “somewhat dating but not really”. Thus begins one of the rekindled romance stories I included in my book, The Lost Love Chronicles. I am THE alternative to no-contact coach! I have been having an affair for 10 years with a single man. All these years you were on my mind. You were happy together, things were going awesome… but somewhere along the way, she lost attraction and decided she didn’t want to be with you anymore. If Someone Loved You Would They Would Change For You? I wanted to be selfish. Sign up to get started. hope some of it makes sense! he replied 2 days later, we exchanged a few pleasant emails about our lives and now we have nothing left to say but I really want to continue talking to him on friendly basis, nothing more. If you want to discover why exes come back after years, you should know that … We never saw each other though. Like a bird learning to fly for the first time. The man who told it to me did as his therapist suggested and contacted … That was 20 years ago. I didnt force it. I said no. Our timing was always horrible. She approached me one day enraged and broke up with me. Do you still feel deprived of her love? it was weird, but nice at the same time. Ex girlfriend contacts me after 10 years. im not gonna be anyones little bit on the side, this is the reason fr deleting him so he knws this **** well too.my husband is the most generous person i know, im not with him for the money but so much more n i realy dont knw if ill ever meet anyone like him again, ill give him that, so please if u have a loving and doting partner dont cheat cos no one likes a cheating scum... Oh that sounds horrible but dont beat yourself up about it, my ex ive msgd him too myself each time n hes super nice about it all n wudnt even say no about meeting up, but ive realised that sme ppl never change, he will cheat on his mrs n keep me on the side, but ive got dignity n self respect!! I wanted to tell her I was so sorry for hurting her but I couldn't. I believe she wants me to tell her to leave her marriage but I don't want her to leave for me...plus I just started a new career & I can't afford to support her & her children at this time. ugh!! The reason for that is because dumpers need a lot of alone time to live their life the way they had envisioned. I thought she was my true love but she messed with my mind. I have a feeling you’ll like what you learn… . It's like we picked up where we left off. His apology. But I do know it was larger than this universe we live in. Before we got separated….mind you, we never had sex, he laid a kiss on my forehead to say goodbye to me before I moved out of state later that same day. Only after I left town did he reveal to me that he was in love with me. Why doesn’t she stop calling me so I can get over her and move on with my life? Anyways we split, I married a wonderful man that is currently my husband of 10 years, we have two kids and recently I ran into my EX and all those butterfly feelings came rushing back, two days after running into him I did some research and found out work place and emailed him. This site is THE alternative to ‘no contact’ sites out there. Scared of rejection. I don't think we'll ever run into each other contact one another and that's ok. Maybe some things are meant to be without end. You two are worlds apart, likely with people in both your lives that love you. My other half. I was in a relationship too. my ex and I are still texting 3 months since our affair ended and shes trying again with the ex she broke up with to start our thing. CANADA. The No-Contact Rule. He never contacted me and I never contacted him. Initiating contact. I would like to know how things going on between you and your ex, if possible. And after that any further conversation, just reminded me, of how much I wanted the man I fell in love with, and how he didn't want me anymore. He asked me if I would give him the opportunity to say them to me. I’m Sorry for What Happened. Yangki, I see that you are against ‘no contact’ , my question to you is, what alternative do you offer? Now, he texts me all the time, that he is thinking of me, and wants to see me. I was only 20 yrs old bak then, this is what made me delete him n am so glad ive gotten rid of it now. What made me delete him off facebook was thinking about how he left me in the first place, he left town n changed his number, i was heart broken for a long time n felt like ****!! What I felt was genuine. I was dating my future wife at the time and my ex made no indication of wanting to meet up or anything. I told him we could talk over the phone. Fear Of Commitment: Relationship Is Not Hopeless. Now my ex hates me. I never understood why and it would eat at my soul a part of me wanted to ask her but I was so scared. LookCatalog.com. i'm so nervous!!! It’s so easy to go with your emotions but you don’t know why he’s back after so long, or if he’s changed at all. Colin March 13th, 2017 at 5:14 PM . In case you decide to continue contact, proceed very cautiously. I was married 10 years, and he got divorce, and got with someone els. She obviously knows how bad I’m hurting and that there is no point in contacting me since nothing is ever going to work between us. Probably reconnect somewhere else behind your back. Fast forward appx 15 years later & she reached out to me on Valentine's Day 2016 (not sure if that was any significance) telling me that she still is always thinking about me & we've been talking everyday since & even met up several times. Don’t do it. If your ex-girlfriend doesn’t seem to bother about new haircut, excessive buying of new clothes and the like, it means she is not ready for changes. I had to have you. One or the other of us being engaged or married. I know, I love him still, but I must never have hope again for it in return. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. Luckily, he got it at the time. The world stopped in front of me. So, we could say that this is one of the biggest signs your ex-girlfriend … Yes that is good..Dont put any pressure on her, or she may resent you if things do not work out too well in future between you both, but she is an adult and can make her own decisions. The downfall? I am in love with an... My husband and I have been married for 10 years. I also emailed and called him so many times. Ignore, Ignore, Ignore, My ex had this, contact from an old gf from 20 years ago, i encouraged the contact as i thought there was nothing wrong with it. I guess this "book" in my life never had an ending and til this day all i want is to finish this final chapter. Girlfriend broke up with me after 10 months because she needs to work on herself and love her self, How I Survived My Affair With A Married Man by Paula. Why Did Your Ex’s Feelings For You Change? You were the best thing to ever happen to me. I wanted to tell her I still loved her but I was so scared. Anyways I cheated on her with this one girl and I think she found out. I couldn't take it anymore so I changed my number and tried to move on. we're both married... By entering this site you declare Wait another year at least and if you still feel the same, commit. At some point the stupid game playing on both sides has to stop if either of you wants ot have a relationship. I don't think he's over her. You were my diamond in the rough. From what I've gathered they're basically just roommates at this point. I’ve been NC for 2 weeks but he has been texting me every other day asking me how I am doing or for random things. Reconciliations take a lot of time. I thought she was the one for me. If this is the case, then the guy most likely is aware of his feelings for you, but he may not want to admit it for fear of rejection or embarrassment. But I agree with you , if he is happy why is he contacting you. Don't do it! Good luck. I can’t for the goodness of me figure out what exactly she is hoping to gain by these phone calls other than prolong my misery. Why Can’t My Ex Decide If They Want Me Back?- Pt 2, Why Your Ex Lost Interest and How to Get It Back, Showing An Ex You Love Them – Be (Very) Careful. Do you really want her to stop contacting you or just frustrated that she has not come out straight and told you that she wants you back – or at least given you clear signals that say she wants you back? That is my fear. If you wait too long, she may decide you’re over her and have moved on. It just happened. This may be why she hints that she’s somewhat dating but not really (translation: I’m still available but it may not be for long). My ex gas recently contacted me after 6 months of no contact and he is in another relationship. If you’re the one who has been initiating contact, your ex starting to initiate … He's rude because he was hurt very badlly by u? This is especially typical of ex-girlfriends . Sometimes it can be hard for a relationship to have a completely clean break when it ends. When I found out my ex had a GF, he didn't tell me I found out 6 months later, after he had been in contact the whole time! He has a daughter now, ☹️ , i've always wanted a daughter, I see pictures of her on fb, and wonder if thats what the baby would have looked like and naturally feel so much love for his daughter!! After 4 weeks I contacted him, we talked and got back together but he broke up with me. When your ex girlfriend reaches out after a long time of no contact, the emotions come back, old passions flare, and your brain starts spinning around wondering what the heck you should do. If You Are Deprived. I was invited to her engagement party where she kissed me passionately but I felt it was too late to do anything about it. A couple years later we started emailing each other & she wanted to get together. Move on and be happy, before you lose what you have. My Ex Responds To Texts Immediately – What Does It Mean? I loved that she kept in contact with me. I've been married for 10 years, great marriage, I thought. When your ex girlfriend keeps reaching out to you, it means you are still on her mind. He did beg me at the time to have it, but I just couldnt!! I know, I messed up. If you just let her have her way with you “against your will”, you’ll become more miserable, angry and disgusted with yourself as time goes on. I’ve written about the signs that your ex secretly wants you back and what really happens when they do— but I’ve neglected a little fuzzy grey area. We cover topics you’d find helpful like how to recover after an ex reaches out, how to set boundaries after a breakup and why ex contact can be so difficult to cut off. But after speaking with him, I was surprised to learn, that I didn't mean that much to him, It ripped my heart out. I think my ex is going to do the same thing. Still we stayed in contact. I was invited to her engagement party where she kissed me passionately but I felt it was too late to do … I would have married this woman in a heartbeat. it's hard, I would give anything for him to say I missed you too, but it never came. COPYRIGHT © 2005 - 2021 ASK THE LOVE DOCTOR - YANGKI AKITENG. Even then it’ll still be possible to get her back but it’ll require more planning, effort and time when she’s with someone else. I felt heartbroken, and fooled for believing in us, and embarrassed. But there was little hope after blowing her off & the fact that she was married. But, according to professional dream analyst and author Lauri Quinn Loewenberg, “Whatever’s going on in the dream is going to reflect not necessarily [what’s going on] between you and your ex, but what’s going on with you.”Read along as Loewenberg explains possible meanings behind various dreams about an ex, and how they might … We agreed to meet the next day and from the time we met he was all over me and touching me and kissing me and told me he missed me. I dropped my ex boyfriend like a hot potato 30 years ago. saying your sorry for hurting another helps sometimes. My advice. 2) She may be feeling guilty for breaking up with you, doesn’t want you to hate her for it and trying to be your “friend” the best way she knows how. You might have completely moved on and be having the time of your life– then suddenly, here’s your ex. So don't think that your ex will run back to you and want to reconnect the day after he or she broke up with you. We never argued or had a harsh word between us. Gosh! ... but he's married. Question: My ex dumped me, and I vented to my sister. Yangki’s Answer: There’s really no telling what’s on her mind. I’m here to tell you that this is a BIG opportunity for you …and it’s something you shouldn’t ruin. Spend your time on those who are willing to commit time to you. I broke up with my ex and he went NC for 4 weeks. (I … I never forgot about you. I never said anything and neither did she. Dating a Man who was married for 10 years. Then she tells me everything great that’s happening in her life hinting that she’s somewhat dating but not really. Should I continue talking to him? We just picked-up right where we left off. my high school love contacted me after a few years of not talking to one another. She asked me how she should react to her old flame contacting her again, and I gave her some easy to follow and concrete advice. She meant the world to me. I did write that i wanted to write him for a long time but didn’t know if it was aporopriate and also that I didn’t expect him to reply to me. If you’re saying “my ex girlfriend keeps contacting me” and you don’t know why… then listen up. Sometimes your lucky and that special one loves you back, hold on to that. Most of the time it was her contacting me. I never figured what she wanted out of us. 3) For her own ego reasons (to see if she still has a certain effect on you). You were my everything. The same promble happen to me. I am torn, should I maintain some form of contact or should I ignore his texts? I am married for 10 years with no kids. see if he wants to be a friend possibly write to him, and if he writes back, then yeah, he did think you were special. wow, i typed so fast my spelling is awful. What I felt for you I can't explain. I don’t know if he still loves you or not, but from his actions it does seem like his contacting you was all about sex. Maturing and realizing what's gone and will be gone. Be smart jimmy. We're both now crazy about each other & I've been trying to keep my distance but our history tells me that I just might be throwing away true love if I walk away again. She never told me why it ended but I had the clue she found out. The other option — which in my humble opinion is juvenile – is to let her messages go to the answering machine. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Ive had other GFs before her but she was special to me. He broke up with me after a year saying I was ready for more than him, he’d only just come out of a marriage and it was his wife’s decision when we got together. Monday, one before this last one, he contacted me, and left a message for me … Alden says May 10, 2020 . My ex-girlfriend recently emailed me 8 years after we broke up. Unfortunately she's still married, tho unhappily (I'm not married). Next thing you know, déjà vu creeps up as you re-read their favorite novel at their go-to café. There was nothing significant that broke us up...just youth & probably my party lifestyle at the time. So I don't want, nor want her, to make any rash decisions. My college ex sent me an email about three years after we broke up. But whatever her reasons are, you acting like a reluctant victim strikes me as either someone who doesn’t want this to stop or someone who has always let her have her way and won’t stand up for yourself and what you want. Well be careful and make sure you actually know her because she may have changed a lot.. She has changed quite a bit...but for the better. Reconnecting with an ex after the breakup takes time. Ex girlfriend contacts me after 10 years. Question: My ex-girlfriend says it’s over and there is no chance for us but she is still calling me and says things like it’s a shame it turned out like this and I saw you today and you looked sad. I was so devastated that I left the country to try to get over her. I cut off contact due to her marriage but later realized I messed up again. I got contacted by an ex like 5 years after we had split, and she called me. Fact #10: It is important to tell the spouse about the contact, right from the beginning. we were together but not official, we just spent a lot of time together and I was so young and loved him, I wanted him but he was a BAD BOY and wasn't ready to settle down. Monday, one before this last one, he contacted me, and left a message for me to give him a call. She has been married for about 5 or 6 years now. I want to make the "recently" part important, because I wonder if this is more of an infatuation. I mean we have both just recently have been through alot emotionally and I guess we would be the safest for each other right now. 10 years later, we were both married, and now both divorced, both just RECENTLY DIVORCES. I was ignorant and naive. Mines a similar story except im the girl and ive approached the guy each time, hes my ex from 10 yrs back i wnted to settle down whichever guy i ended up with, but he was my first love he was very attractive, he was a party goer young lad too, no real reason why it ended but mainly becos his family moved up north, hes maried now with a daughter and so am i married too but i miss him like mad, im the one that msgd him each time, hes never been negative about it at all, he loves it, but then i think its just lust, in my head now, altho young at the time he knew what he wanted, n he was the one thAt changed his number.. He was my first boyfriend, and I his first girlfriend, and we dated for nearly five years before I broke up with him. I also emailed and called him so many times. Go see him! It was the real thing. I learned a lesson, that everything I felt, was just me,and his feelings as much as I hoped would be different, I can't change. A bond created to make the perfect formula. It’s not enough to be against something but offer no alternative. I have been in and out of contact with my first love for 30 years. This is the email from Rosalia: “Hi Alex, just got to the office today and there was an email from out-of-the-blue from my Ex boyfriend who’d dumped me for another woman almost 10 years … What’s The Best Way To Ask My Ex Out on A Date? ☹️ …your ex making contact with you after a significant amount of time has gone by isn’t because she likes you and wants to rekindle that flame. ... is that he said just 24 hours after the spell is done is when my ex will come and as i am talking to you people now my ex is came back to me exactly after 24 hours as he said and now i and my family are living very happily. Emotional Momentum – Moving Things Forward With An Ex, Break From Your Ex Vs. I haven’t responded because I don’t want to break the NC rule. Started talking to him and his differnt not the same guy I fell in love with. You will get blamed for wrecking her marriage, even if that's not true, and wtf do you think she'll do when she starts getting bored with you?